Most of my posts of late have been me complaining about not making progress. They might not seem that bad to you as the reader but I assure you I was wallowing. I did not cross the line to feeling sorry for myself but I was angry.
Tomorrow I will post my plan for July.
Diet + Workout
I am putting my scale in the closet.
It started with a chip. A corn chip to be more precise. I cut up an avocado. I was going to eat it with a spoon. I chose a chip. Then the spiral happened. I ate some blueberry’s and Greek yogurt. I had a ham sandwich. Nothing crazy. But that chip trigged me to accept the lie.
The lie was that since I fucked up my plan that we will just re start tomorrow. There is always tomorrow. And I ate more food off my plan.
I have to learn to compress the time if I eat off plan and getting back on plan. Like after 1 bite. Not after 1 meal. Not after 1 day.
See you tomorrow.
T
11:18 am I am back. I missed my accountability journal. Not much has happened really. I was mindful of not putting too much crap in my mouth. I was active. But I was not following a “plan.” I was not following my plan.
The Result? Stagnation. Better than losing ground.
My mindset is ok. I am ready to get back on track and my daily blogging was a big part of that.
9:17pm I ate around 1pm – Shrimp and bacon – it was left over from the weekend. I am trying to eat as few carbs as possible.
I am not feeling inspired today. I am tired.
I did get my Body Weight Strength home gym setup. And I did a small workout today. I must get over how limited I am due to being so fat. I need to remember that doing something is better than doing nothing.
Wishing you peace.
June 1st and 2nd (today) have been my typical pattern that leads me to the following results.
June 1, 2019 – I weighed 265
June 1, 2020 – I weighed 265
In that 12 month period my lowest weight was 245.
My highest weight was 280.
That is a 35 pound difference.
Here is one more graph to bring the point home.
It dates back ten years to 2010. I am pretty sure I was over 300 pounds since 2007.
I found a book in 2012. The Rosedale Diet. Interesting book considering it was written in 2006. It was about eating low carb and the right type of fats to control the hormone Leptin. You can see in the graph it worked. It was a great time in my life. I did not really understand the science. I did not care about the science. I followed what the book said and I lost 75 pounds.
Since 2015 I have been stuck in the Victim/Villain/Guide loop. I learned more and more and more and more and more and more and with each passing book I could not get the weight loss to resume. I have another 100 pounds to lose. Fuck. 100 pounds.
But at this point who fucking cares. I am going to solve the problem.
Here is what I am doing.
For a whole list of reasons I operate best with structure and fewer options. I have no issue eating the same things. I am the guy that order the same meal at the same restaurant.
Here is my Food List:
These are rules. There is no doubt if I follow them or not. You could be with my 24/7 for the next 30 days and know if I ate according to this plan. That is why I want to make them simple. Easy for me to know if I am following my plan or not. No grey.
My goal is to eat 2x a week. Therefore a 72 hour fast and a 48 hour fast. I am thinking Sundays and Wednesdays as my eating days.Repeat.
My Blogging Schedule: –
Sunday – Friday
Saturdays will be off – Family time
See You Tomorrow.
I was excited to share my plans for June today. But the day got away from me and in light of what is going on in our cities, I need some time.
I will provide a full update tomorrow. But here are some numbers to mark it.
June 1, 2020 – 265 pounds.
May 1, 2020 – 265 pounds.
No loss this month and I looked at myself in the mirror today without a shirt. I balked at taking a picture due to no change.
Talk to you tomorrow.
Terry Grier 