The Key Metric in Making Change

The best advice I heard and verified in my own life is the following for quitting something.

Keep quitting until you have quit.

Step 1:

Decide that you are going to make a change. You know without a shred of doubt that it is bad for you.

Step 2:

Never doubt the decision.

Step 3: (if needed)

If you fail, repeat steps 1 and 2.

How To Track Your Way to Success!

The only metric I would suggest you track is the amount of time (mins, hours, days, weeks) that passes until your restart.

If you can shorten this time you are on the path to success.

If you ignore the fact you are off course then you are heading in the wrong direction.

The hardest part is to not ignore the truth that you have committed too.

Ignoring a problem can feel good in the moment but it delays the pain. We all know this.

When I wanted to stop drinking alcohol, and I would drink again, I stopped worrying about how many failures happened and I focused on starting again.

I would restart my journey.

It took me about 3 years.

The last time I opened a beer I took one sip and I threw the rest away. That was my last drink.

Your Friend.


My 2021 Weight Loss Reset

Audio Reading of this Post

I am obese with 90 pounds to lose.

I have repeated the same pattern the last 4 years of my life. It happens in 3 acts.

Act 1

January I get pissed at myself that I have gained weight through the holidays. I learn to forgive myself and I recommit myself.

Act 2

Feburary thought August

2 steps forward 1 step back. But weight comes off slowly. I do well for a week or two and then when I see success I “treat” myself to ice cream or some shit by telling myself I earned it. I earned it when I still look like this?

Act 3

Septmeber through December

I say fuck it. I accept bad self talk and give up. I tried hard and I am the same I have been for years, I tell myself. Enjoy the holidays and we can look at getting this going again.

I lose 20 pounds.

I gain 20 pounds.

2020 – 2021

This year I did a little something different. With COVID and my Gold Gym being closed, I took to Youtube looking for workouts I could do at home and I found JT Texieria of Body Weight Strength

I also joined his community on discord via patreon.

I also decided to experiment with carnivore diet.

  • Beef
  • Seafood – Oysters, Shrimp, Sardines etc
  • Eggs
  • Bacon (limited)
  • Coffee (black) + Tea (hot and iced)
  • Avocado – with my sardines

I was successful.

So what happened?

I slowly started to go back to old eating habits. The difference this time was I never said “fuck it” I would reset.

On an asside resetting and starting again can be seen as a postive – the “Never Give up!” Good for you!. But reseting and then feeling that you know in 3 days there is an event you have to go to and that you might break etc. It wears you down.

Lesson #1 is that you must be honest with yourself. That is why I take pictures like these with my shirt off. I need to face myself. I assure you in my minds eye – I do not look that fat. In fact in todays FAT America – I look around and I am pretty normal.

Long and Short

Jan 1, 2021 my weight was 256 pounds.

Jul 1, 2021 my weight was 258 pounds.

I broke the cycle.

So now what?

To be honest, I had a small melt down yesterday. I had pitty party for myself “I will never be appropriate weight and strong. Just say fuck it.”

But the next day, I faced facts, and set my resolve. Again.

Lesson #2 No one is coming to save me. It is me vs myself each day. Each Hour. Each Minute.

Opportunity is here.

I am going to get this journey done and if you care to follow along – I am going to document my progress here.

My moto is showing not telling.

If you have questions, email me and ask. But recommendations? I do not have much to offer. Follow along and see what I do and if it might work for you.

It is my hope that my journey might inspire someone to start theirs.

Thank you for reading. Terry

My Most Productive Time in My Life

The year was 2001.
The Device was the Handspring Visor Platinum.
The Software was Palm Desktop.

It was a simple setup and the sync was perfect.

Palm Desktop contains four main modules which correspond to the four main modules of the original Palm Pilot:

Contacts, analogous to index cards in a Rolodex card file or address book

Calendar information as discrete or repeating appointments

Tasks, sortable by priority, date or category in task lists

Notes, for reference materials, memoranda or journal entries

I made my life fit in these buckets.

I had spent a year trying to make Microsoft Outlook work for me. Then I got the handspring – and I spent another 3 months trying to make it work with Outlook via 3rd party sync apps. Horrible.

I met a guy at a networking group and he had a Palm Pilot. I asked him what he used etc. He said Palm Desktop. Quick. Easy. Simple.

There was not a lot of options then unlike today. iOS has how many task and calendar and note taking apps that rarely work together?

It is one reason for my personal (not work life) I use iCloud. It is not perfect but it has all of these elements and they work.


Steven Wilson has a new song out that I dig. “Self”

The video is strange and thought provoking.

Jon Blestein writing for Rolling Stone – Quotes Wilson:

Self’ is about our new age of narcissism and self-obsession, one in which a human race that used to look out with curiosity at the world and the stars now spends much of its time gazing at a little screen to see themselves reflected back in the mirror of social media.

So few artist make social commentary that has a bite any longer.

Perhaps, I am missing most of it due to the fact I am an middle aged white dude who truly does not understand or enjoy modern rap and hip hop which I think is where most of the action is these days.

This song along with my interest in developing a deeper life made me think about Huxley’s Brave New World.

The “Brave New World” denizens were plied with pleasure, distraction, advertisement and intoxicating drugs to lull them into complacency, a world of perfect consumerism, with lower classes doing all the work for an elite.

Pioneerleadership’s Blog

I wonder where a citizen would find pleasure, distraction, advertisement and consumerism all in one device?

PS: Here are the lyrics to “Self”

Self-help and self-aware
Self-made millionaire
Turn it up and tone it down
Entertain like a fucking clown

Self-image and self-belief
Selfish acts between the sheets
Self has no sense of tact
Self is too self-detached

We are self, the self that loves itself now
We are self, I only see myself now

Self-absorbed and self-obsessed
If not me then someone else
Self sees a billion stars
But still can only self-regard

We are self, the self that loves itself now
We are self, I only see myself now

(I am the universe)

We are self, the self that loves itself now
We are self, I only see myself now

Radio Paradise – An Online Radio Station

Seeing the recent backlash around the updated Apple Music design such as Apple Music Music sucks I thought I would share what I listen to most days.

It is a an online commercial free radio station. A stream. You turn it on and listen. Here is the webplayer but there are many ways to listen. Most days I stream it through my Homepod.
Here is how Bill the owner and mastermind describes it

RP’s Main Mix is a blend of many styles and genres of music, carefully selected and mixed by two real human beings, and presented in ultra high fidelity sound.

Our specialty is taking a diverse assortment of songs — modern and classic rock, world music, electronica, even a bit of classical and jazz — and making them flow together in a way that makes sense harmonically, rhythmically, and lyrically.

I started listening to RP back in 2003. It first aired in Feb of 2000

There are so many cool things about this station. But my recommendation is to give it an hour. There is feel to this station. It takes a little time for the magic of what it is to wash over you.

I hope you give it a listen and I would enjoy hearing your thoughts.

Personal Sabbatical 2021

I am spending a couple of days camping at the South Llano River State Park on the Llano River near Junction Texas. I am camping by myself.

I wanted to take some time to be alone.

I grew up an only child. Time alone is nothing new to me. However, how I use that time alone is.

I am 52 now. Who do I want to be?

Not the person my mother wanted me to be. Not the person culture thought I should be but who do I want to be?

I think I know. But I want to reflect.

My health is a big part of this for me.

For me this means, being 160-170 pounds (I am 5’9). Strong. I can do pull-ups and other exercises. And that at least a couple of my abs are showing.


Perhaps, I just want to live longer and better than my mother, grandmother and others in my family.

As Dr. Peter Atia talks about training to be a kick 100 year old. That is who I want to be.
Without your health what do you have?

The irony in 2021 is that I have my iPad Pro with me and I can post to a blog from here. So you could ask the question – how alone am I?

Until Next Time.

South Llano River, South of Junction Texas

Suzyn Waldman is an inspiration to girls and women who want to work in sports

Who is Suzyn Waldman?

> Waldman is considered a pioneer in the male-dominated field of sports broadcasting.[4][5] She is the third woman in Major League Baseball history to serve as a full-time color commentator on a regular basis, after Betty Caywood in 1964 and Mary Shane in 1977. In the mid-1990s, she was a play-by-play announcer for the Yankees’ local TV broadcasts on WPIX, which made her the second woman to serve in that capacity on TV for a major league team, after Gayle Gardner in 1993. via wiki

I am not a hardcore baseball fan. I have fond memories of watching the Cubs in the early 80’s before the lights in Wriggley on WGN with my father and grandmother.

In recent years, living in Central Texas, I have become an Astro’s fan. I use the MLB app to stream the radio broadcast and I have learned over the last 5 years to really enjoy listening vs watching baseball. You develop a bond or kinship with the announcers. They matter.

Suzyn calls for the Yankee’s. Not a favorite team of mine. I enjoy her calling the games. So much that if the Astros are not playing and I want to listen to a baseball game, I will listen to the Yankee’s to hear her.

She was recently interviewed by Sarah Lang on the MLB Youtube Channel. Link

> Suzyn Waldman is an inspiration to girls and women who want to work in sports. (via @mlb)

What is a Blog?

In 2002 Rebecca Blood wrote a book to document the growth of weblogs – later know as blogs.

A weblog is a coffeehouse conversation in text, with references as required.

Rebecca Blood – 2002 from her book the weblog handbook

Why am I hammering blogs these last couple of days?

I feel that social media, I am looking at you Zuck, have failed us. We traded easy and free for our free will and free expression. Facebook and Instagram decide what you see. The company wants you to stare at the app for a long time. They are making money from your attention. They are in your relationships. The intent is to manipulate your mind and emotions for their profit not yours.

When I deleted my Facebook and Instagram accounts I was free. But I still wanted to express myself. I had this blog I opened back in 2018 to document my health journey so I decide to post more here.

I think you should consider moving your daily thoughts to a blog as well. has plans for $4 a month. Forget about likes and comments. Think about self expression and sharing your story.

If you have a personal blog – let me know in the comments.

How To Attribute in 2021

I have been blogging more and thinking about blogging more in 2021. One thing I have noticed around the web and on social is that lack of attribution and/or a common style for attribution e.g. Elements of Style.

A favorite blogger of mine CJ Chilvers retweeted Tina aka Swiss Miss:

I have been reading Rebecca Blood’s book the weblog handbook

I arranged the book in roughly the order I expect most people approach the subject, first explaining what weblogs are and why anyone would want to read or maintain one, and then moving through more practical considerations: how to choose a tool to update your site, how to make your weblog stand out, and how to attract an audience. I answer commonly asked questions about weblog etiquette, explain what you need to know about living online, and give you some suggestions for dealing with burn-out. In short, I’ve done my best to get everything I know about maintaining a weblog — any kind of weblog — onto the page so that you can benefit from my experience.

Rebecca Blood about her book the weblog handbook

Here is a review from her site:

“ This book almost rivals Strunk and White’s Elements of Style in eloquence and utility. ”

— Herkimer- Perkins

I recommend the book.

If you use something. Link to it.

If you quote something. Give attribution.

The internet before social media was about sharing.

The social media internet of today is about having your moment. About your personal authority or influence. If you use an idea that works for you who cares where it came from right? You used it better! Wrong.

Do the right thing. Be a good citizen of the internet.

Updated: PS: if you need a paper copy here is a link to one at Half Priced Books.